Now the Race is On and Here Comes Pride in the Backstretch

I have new yarn on the way!!!!  My Muppet colorway is wending it’s way to me from AnotherCraftyGirl on Etsy and I’m SO excited!   This is my first time to order yarn from her and I cannot WAIT to get my digits on it and start knitting it up.  However, I’m trying DESPERATELY to get Sugar is Sweet as close to finished as I can before it gets here.  I have 47 rows left. Forty-seven.  Rows are so long now I don’t seem to be able to do more than 5 or so a day due to time constraints.  (Yes, I’m alone all day but I have other stuff to do too.  Also, NO KNITTING when the family is about.  NONE.  They distract me and OMG the frogging and the swearing and the rending of clothes that occurs!!!)

Anyway, ahem, I find myself racing the mailman.  I AM setting the shawl aside once my Muppet Colorway gets here, no matter what.  I am using the new yarn for a KAL.  It’s my first ever and I am NOT gonna fail out of it!  NONONONONONO.  It’s a new kinda challenge for me and I’m interested to see if I can meet it without losing my mind.  Project has to be completed by May 31.  I knit slowly.  Eeeek.  It’s April 27th already!  This should be interesting…  I’ll post a WIP photo once I get started.

This weekend is gonna be busy.  We have had some unwelcome visitors all week and HOPEFULLY they’ll be leaving us in the next day or two.  We’ve got a moth infestation in our garage, of all places.  We bought a bug zapper to take the lil basta’ds out, but apparently the weave on the cage is too tight for them to get in.  Tonight we clean out all boxes and whatnot and begin with the bug spray and cedar chips.

We’re also getting MORE visitors Sunday, but these we like.  My Inlaws are coming in to help us put up The Tween’s Trampoline.  He should be able to mess around on it some before leaving for the summer.  (God, that’s just getting closer and closer.)

Friday Funny?  Here ya go:

If ONLY it were that simple!


Grab Your Boots and Cape

Sorry for the lack of post yesterday.  I spent the majority of my day futzing with my Sugar is Sweet shawl.  I’m actually pretty excited.  I THINK I finally have it working properly.  I managed to do a row of K4Tog-TBL and K4Tog without destroying my garment OR stabbing myself in the eye with a knitting needle.  It took me almost 3 hours to do that ONE row, but by God I DID IT!

That’s one of the coolest parts of this knitting thing.  I’m physically doing something, and at this point it’s almost all new.  When I manage to master something it feels GREAT and I have something to show for it.  Granted, it’s never a PERFECT copy of the pattern, but when I cook I don’t follow the recipe to the letter either.

My superhero name?   “Danger Girl!”  or… yanno… “Can’t follow instructions Girl!”

Knitting Therapy

So… knitting for relaxation.  It’s not working out so well for me right now.  I cannot get this shawl to work out right.  I have no CLUE what I’m doing wrong.  Every time I THINK I have it figure out I’m proven wrong and I AM NOT FROGGING this thing again!  *stares around the internet wild eyed and panting*

I’m forging on with it and trying to correct as I go.  It’s likely going to be a hot mess when I’m done, but we’ll see…

Today I have ripped out over 1000 stitches and knit 5 rows of the shell pattern… incorrectly… but yes… I knit 5 rows.  My head hurts.

Someone pass the wine!!!!

Slip Sliding Away…

We are gearing up for the summer months.   The Tween gets out of school mid-May, and POTENTIALLY is leaving 2 days later for 8 weeks of being spoiled by grandparents and The Ex. (The Ex is The Tween’s bio-dad.)  I’m always so conflicted as we gear up for this part of the year.

The uninterrupted time with The Husband will be really nice.  We can really focus on us and just being together which is usually, pretty freaking fabulous.  However, I feel guilty for looking forward to that.  I’m really going to miss The Tween DESPITE the problems we’ve been having with him and his mouth/attitude.  He’s a really loving, sweet kid who is trying to learn to use sarcasm and humor, but doesn’t quite get the timing.  OMG HIS TIMING IS SO, SO HORRIBLE!  Seriously.  90% of the time he’s in trouble it’s due to this.  (Or what he CLAIMS is just jokes.  I STILL think he uses that to get out of trouble.  “OH SHIT I CROSSED THE LINE.  TIME TO SAY IT WAS A JOKE…” His internal monologue probably isn’t QUITE that organized, but he’s enough like ME that it’s ‘prolly a snarky S.O.B.)

Today’s portion of planning “The Big Trip” was buying his airline ticket to go see my parents for 2 weeks.  Tickets are CRAZY expensive, yo!  Also, he’s 11 so I have to pay the “Unaccompanied Minor” fee for him which adds another $100.00 to the price.  (If he has a layover it’s totally worth it, but for non-stop flights it’s kind of stupid really…) I was JUST about to buy his ticket when another option opened up.  HOPEFULLY, I’ll be flying him for about 1/4th the cost AND he’ll be accompanied on the flight by my ex-mil.  That would make things SO much easier.  I still have to flesh out all the details, and talk to my folks about it.  It moves his trip up by a week.  So, of course, my timeline for getting everything done is OFF the rails, but I’ll make it work.  It’s totally worth it for the savings and him having someone we know and trust with him on the flight.

I’m really excited about my knitting projects!  (Hang on, I’ll let you work out the conversational whip-lash for a moment…) Ok.  So, I’ve been knitting on Sugar is Sweet again.  I have 6 more rows until I’m at the shell pattern!  I’m so excited!  *quivers in my boots*  I thought I was closer than I was last week.  Apparently I need more fingers and toes to count with.  Oy!  HOWEVER, this weekend I’ll be working the shell pattern and HOPEFULLY I’ll have finished the shawl by the following weekend.

I do find I’m having an issue getting myself started with the knitting.  I enjoy it, but I keep putting off starting and don’t get NEARLY as much done as I could/should.  Not sure what that’s all about. I’m trying to get better about it.  It really DOES relax me and help my stress levels.  In fact, yesterday after posting here, I knit for a couple of hours and felt SO MUCH BETTER after.  Sometimes, I’m an idiot.

Finally, the weekend is upon us.  I thought I’d leave you with a Friday Funny:

I’m Feeeeeear… Fear Fallin’…

I love to knit.  I love the rhythm once I really get into a pattern.  I love the feel of the soft, fluffy yarn sliding through my fingers.  However, I am NOT a “Good Knitter”.  I get very frustrated when I can’t get a pattern to work the first time.  Starting over the 10th time?  I begin making up new swear words because I’m tired of saying the same ones over and over and over.  Yet, I really DO love to knit.  I just have no Zen.

I’ve begun to realize, one of my biggest flaws is that I’m a perfectionist.  I hate not doing things right or well.  Unfortunately, that has turned into a huge problem.  My internal monologue begins with, “Well, I probably can’t do this right so I’m not going to even start it…”  I used to be unafraid to try new things, to just DO something new.  Now I’ve become too scared.  My knitting is a perfect example of it.  I can Knit, Purl, KYOK and K2Tog.  I’ve learned those quickly and efficiently, but now I’m stuck.  I balk at trying any patterns that require me to learn beyond those few stitches.  Mentally I freeze and panic.  I tell myself, “Master those others first before taking on a NEW stitch.”  or  “WTF are you thinking?  You’re not ready for THAT!”

The more I think about this, the more I see how much of my life I’ve wasted being afraid I’d fail.  It kind of pisses me off, yo.

What exactly is there to be afraid of if I fail?  Yes I might look silly or be embarrassed, but no more so than I did or was Friday night staggering down The Plaza.  I did THAT.  I’ve given BIRTH.  There is no sillier looking process.

Why did I become so scared of failing and WHEN did that fear overtake my life?