Something Blue

Sometimes, being far from my family sucks.

There are 3 states between my family and I.  Sometimes, the distance doesn’t bother me.  I DO miss them in the minutiae of my day to day, but that’s what phones and texts and online communication is for.  The holidays though, the big life events that I miss, I hate that part.

Last holiday season I didn’t get to see my family at all.  Even The Tween was elsewhere.  I did NOTHING for the holidays here at home.   I didn’t want a tree.  I didn’t bake cookies or make candy.  All those things are family activities for me.  Of course, NOT doing those things for myself just deepened my depression and anxiety about the holidays.  It was less than smart to not do SOMETHING here at home.  We DID celebrate Christmas and Thanksgiving with my InLaws and it was really nice.  I enjoyed myself, but there was a big hole in my heart where my parents, my brother and the rest of my family should have been.

Today I found out someone that has always held a special place in my heart is getting married in November.  There’s no way I can go.  Transportation, timing and money all play a role in keeping me from it.  However, KNITTING TO THE RESCUE… hopefully.

I’m going to knit her wedding garter for her.  I found a lovely pattern over at Knitting Alone.  It’ll be my first try at lace work, but at least I can do some small special thing for her on this important day.

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