Lend Me Your Ear

Eight more days and The Tween will be done with 6th grade.  Two days later he’ll leave for eight weeks, two months.  Forty-four days and he’ll turn twelve years old.  It’s crazy how fast this school year has gone by and how quickly my child is growing up.  I see all the potential in the world in him, but helping HIM see it is difficult.

He’s been in trouble a LOT this year.  We’ve had issues with talking back, poor study habits, his belief that we don’t know anything, and lying.  It’s been rough on all of us.  However, he’s made the A-B Honor Roll every quarter, he has tried SO hard to keep his mouth and attitude in check at times, and he’s tried to do things for both The Husband and I just to be nice. He’s also done it to broker good will when he’s in trouble.  He tried to wash the Jeep… while it was still in the garage.  He cleaned the kitchen… and re-organized it leaving me lost when I tried to cook dinner.

I know he feels like he can’t do anything right. He’s said those words to me.

I want him to understand something, so I’m putting it out here into the Blogaverse for him to see:

You are a great kid.  You’re funny, smart and have a loving heart.  You’re stubborn like I am.  Your frustration threshold is low and I know you got your temper from me.  I yell, a lot sometimes, and I correct you even more than that.  I know sometimes you feel like you hate me because of it.  You think I’m mean because I won’t let you watch R rated moves or play M rated games, because I won’t let you take your cell phone to school or play games online with random people.  Sometimes I hate myself because of all the conflict.

I do it anyway, not because it’s my job, not because I enjoy it.  I do it because I love you and I want you to reach all that potential I see in you.  I know how desperately you want to be a grown up and you’ll get there sooner than any of us can imagine, but you’re not there yet.  Let us help you find your way there.  Don’t fight us so hard.  Don’t try to run there so fast.  The road there can be filled with fun and laughter if you don’t rush.

Reading to his cousin.

I promise to try not to hold you back and to give you your head.  I promise to be here when you need help and to try to stay out of your way when you don’t.  Just try not to outdistance me.  My love can reach you anywhere, but my arms can’t.

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